I am not a huge fan of biographies or autobiographies (rather I’m more indifferent), but this one is great.
You can read the synopsis via amazon here, but I really wanted to share this particular passage about his views of homosexuality.
From page 210:
Buggery is not at the end of the yellow brick road somewhere over the homosexual rainbow, it is not the prize, the purpose, the goal of fulfillment of homosexuality. Buggery is not the achievement which sees homosexuality move from becoming into being; buggery is not homosexuality’s realization or destiny. Buggery is as much a necessary condition of homosexuality as the ownership of a Volvo estate car is a necessary condition to middle-class family life, linked irretrievably only in the minds of the witless and the cheap…
There are plenty of other things to be got up to in the homosexual world outside the orbit of the anal ring, but the concept that really gets the gay-hater, the idea that really spins their melon and sickens their stomach is that most terrible and terrifying of all human notions, love.
That one can love another of the same gender, that is what the homophobe cannot stand. Love in all eight tones and all five semitones of the world’s full octave. Love as agape, Eros and philos; love as romance, friendship, and adoration; love as infatuation obsession and lust; love as torture, euphoria, ecstasy and oblivion (this is beginning to read like a Calvin Klein perfume catalogue); love as need, passion, and desire.
All the rest of it, parking your dick up an arse, slurping at a helmet, whipping, frotting, peeing, pooping, squatting like a dog, dressing up in plastic and leather – all of these things go on in the world of boy and girl too: and let’s be clear about this, they go on more – the numbers make it so. Go into a sex shop, skim through some pornography, browse the internet for a time, talk to someone in the sex industry. You think homosexuality is disgusting? Then, it follows, it follows as the night the day, that you find sex disgusting, for there is nothing done between two men or two women that is, by any objective standard, different from that which is done between a man and a woman.
Fry has summed up the entire problem of the people who think homosexuality is wrong and I just love him for it.
(Well, for everything. He’s pretty awesome.)
Until we can get people to accept this beautiful and heart wrenching reality, that homosexuality is about love and not sex, there is no hope for marriage equality or general acceptance.
There are many great passages in this book that feel like they were written off my own soul and not Fry’s. I can’t recommend it any more sincerely.