Sunday, January 18, 2009

Scott rocks my socks off

There are just some days when inspiration is a stingy bitch and the world is too hung over to entertain us. When these boring days quench any spark of genius I might have sparked while banging my head on the keyboard, there is only one thing left to do: steal it from someone else.

There is this guy on myspace who I secretly stalk love. I've wanted to add him to my friends forever, but I feel weird about being friends with people I don’t actually know.

His name is Scott. This is the first blog I ever read of his and it’s awesome. Freggin awesome.
The “hot girl” Lifestyle

Is it really getting you anywhere? Are you having that much fun? oh, I’m sure you're meeting a ton of quality individuals and spending time with people whom you will have lasting, meaningful relationships with... haaa. after working downtown for a few years at the "hottest" clubs, whatever that appears to mean, it pretty much makes me want to puke when I see these poor, trashy souls dumping money into their nasty wardrobes to attract worthless scummy douche bags to give both of their lives some semblance of meaning in this capitalist fuckall. I’m not saying the future holds any promise much more than frustration, disappointment, and death, but there does exist some possibility of a life devoid of the necessity to boost your silly ego with the fleeting grace that blowing a hundred bucks on drinks and making an ass of yourself on the sidewalk of some posh shit hole you paid another thirty or fifty affording you the ability of ascending to the rank of "cool" does.

I think a serious reality check is in order for my pretties. I keep my dealings in the industry fairly low-key. Obviously it's easy money when you deal with a population of a couple thousand that have a combined I.Q. of roughly 34 but I digress. And that is the first time i have ever digressed or what have you. I mean if you're over 21 then you are already far past medium on your way to well-done and sister, let me tell you, no man worth his sauce eats his steak anything other than medium-rare. That why when you order a fifty dollar steak it has no dressing, and when you pick one up at Denny’s, well, here comes the A1. The perfume and slinky, revealing hips and lips and thighs are the A1 of the industry. If you've passed your prime - time to find a new line of work.

"I just go out to have fun with my girls."

Liar. You’re the most desperate because you probably have yourself fooled into believing that your own deteriorating mental state and super-self-assuredness is normal and healthy. It’s not. People who have so-called self-esteem have no need to notice it, defend it, or spend six days a week to prepare for the three hours they get out on the town and get hammered drunk. you see, I factor in all the time you spend at the gym, whitening your teeth, lengthening your hair and nails, priming and primping your disgustingly unnatural orange tan and the shopping for your wretched outfits that look near exact to what every other whore in your party are donning. okay so you may not be there to pick up dick but you're sure as fuck there to have a wallet pick you up because let's face it, that's what our parents teach us. if you have not enough brains to hold down a regular job or, what's more likely, erroneously believe that you're as pretty and deserving as daddy made you feel while he basted you with praise as a tender young tart, then of course you're seeking out that basting rod which only cash satiates - however momentarily.

"I love my husband/boyfriend."

Then why are you out surrounded by sweaty apes? you undoubtedly were married far too young or to the wrong man - like your mother and it's too bad she didn't work on herself more or she might have passed on some useful traits to her egg before it got sour or cracked. Now I’m not actually saying this because I would ever want to help you out. it makes for a good laugh when I know exactly how a woman would be in bed and what she would say day in and out simply by how she is dressed and carries herself on any particular occasion. And yes it is that simple and generic. Are you seriously going to argue with me? Look into yourself more; if you're honest enough with yourself - which you aren't - then you'll know what I mean. I am quite certain that you can even see it in others yet never not in yourself, heavens no. I laugh.

VIP on the left, general admission on the right. Yeah, your name is on this piece of paper just get your fake tits out of my face. Do you feel better about yourself now? Sweet. Pay at the door and have that loser with a bankroll for personality buys you some liquid so you both can forget your pitiful shared existence. Another match made in god's divine realm.


How could you not love a person after that? I will leave you with another one of my favorites. This time he wrote about prop 8 (he lives in San Diego) and it’s brilliant.

I know it’s long, but I love it and it’s my blog so I'll do what I want to. Nah nah nah nah nah. :)
Kids with yes on 8 signs

I do not myself believe that marriage is an inalienable right given unto us by a god for use solely by one party comprised of one man and one woman. I believe marriage is a contract between two morons who have allowed themselves to be duped into believing that marriage is sacred and eternal and other silly things and who trust that it isn’t the ultimate symbol of submission to stupidity. However, I also believe that any two (or maybe three or four or whatever condition satisfies their equation) people should be allowed to embark on this whirlwind tour of retarded exuberance at their own peril without the intervention of another individual or groups creative deity figure. Here is one of a handful of instances that I have been involved with recently in which I have directly engaged with people wishing harm on others. I encourage more people to try different tactics to knock some fucking sense into these cretins.

So I keep seeing these asshole Christians putting their kids on the corner of penasquitos drive and carmel mountain road with 'yes on 8' signs in their hands. Today there were 6 or 7 young teen boys between probably 13 and 16 years old. Okay so let’s forget for the moment that these nimrods are not of voting age and probably shouldn’t be expressing their opinions on how others should vote because in effect they are simply being used as propaganda tools by anti-gay right wing Christians and other dildos. I’m not one to get offended by ignorance; instead I challenge it the best way I know how: cursing and name calling.

So after I had spotted my prey (not in a pedophile way though) I pulled up to the stop light at penasquitos drive near the double tree hotel in rancho penasquitos and rolled down my window. I made eye contact with a young lad who was waving about a sign that stated "prop 8 = religious freedom". Now, some people may believe that the best way to combat such glaring expressions of ignorance is with rational, level headed debate and dialogue. This isn’t how I handle situations such as these. After getting his attention I asked the kid point blank, "do you even know what that sign means that you're holding?"

He mustered all of his early-teen manliness, took a breath, and spoke with as deep sounding a voice as he could and said flatly, "yes, yes I do."

So I replied, "it means you hate gays."

He stammered for a reply as his eyes glossed over and the other high schoolers gathered closer in once they caught wind of what I had said. His reply was a short and defensive, "n n n no I don’t."

"Yes," I said again, "you hate gays."

At this point his buddies started towards my car and held their various 'yes on 8' placards out like crusaders attempting to block the spears of defending Moslems.

To each one I turned and assured them that they indeed, "hate gays."

"You hate gays." I said to one as he instantly grew frustrated at this confounding accusation.

"You hate gays, those signs mean, you hate gays" came my assertion over and over.

"I don’t hate gays!" one insisted.

But he did indeed hate gays and I reminded him of his sign by responding that, "that sign means you hate gays."

At this point I disallowed the young sirs the opportunity to express their innocence by pointedly attacking them continually with the phrase, "you hate gays."

"You hate gays."

"You hate gays."

"You hate gays."

I told this to each kid a few times and pointed directly to their center for added effect. the kids did not have a coordinated defense. Essentially I cut into them with exactly the type of attack that they were not prepared for. I put them on the defense viscerally not with semantics and once pushed back on their heels, they easily toppled to the pressure of whatever faith and servitude initially brought them to that place.

After notifying each of the 6 or 7 kids over and over that they in fact hated gays, I drove off. I watched in my rear view as they huddled to discuss what had happened. They were visibly upset by the simple name calling and negative labeling associated with their impish pleas of innocence and their outlandish expression of hatred. "I don’t hate gays," the first had said out of disgust. But the problem with his banner waving, as innocent and ignorant as it may have been, is the lack of understanding of the full context of the hatred and fear of homosexuals throughout our shared history. When one of these kids blindly obeys his parents (or pastors), as was obviously the case here, he is perpetuating the hatred that has plagued human society since its inception.
Hatred of the other, fear of the non-norm, or persecution of some perversion of perceived civility that infects a human system is most certainly evil. What is laughable, if only in its ironic incongruence with blatant truth, are the claims and views held by the self-proclaimed righteous over those deemed evil. In this case we find religion in its most arcane and simple form: a fear based survival tactic. Survival as it is understood here is a claimed adherence to supposed traditions of social conduct. Social conduct, while masquerading as some commonly held civil procedure, is actually the oppression of an expression of freedom of will by a group of non-adherents to the supposed majority practice. Thus what we find as being offered forth as the 'good' are those practices which are held by one group though not in another. while the second groups' adherents may share some practices with those whom adhere to the first group there does exist a breaking point at which both groups have inherent equal right to claim practices that are 'good' for themselves while negating the ability of the first to make the claim that the second groups good practices are indeed 'evil' or vice versa. Since we know that the second group is not attempting to simultaneously make the claim that the first groups practices are evil we can assert the ruling that the first group is acting alone in its oppressive behavior and must move to censure their efforts forthwith. As such I compel those who have followed the discussion to immediately begin to speak out and express their severe disapproval of the actions of those who follow the oppression of another individual or group as it arises throughout this case.

If you vote yes on prop 8, then you too hate gays, and you are not voting for religious freedom no matter how much you convince yourself that that is the case. And you’re a fucking prick which is why I won’t spend time proving that prop 8 involves absolutely nothing to do with religious freedom. It has solely to do with hatred, fear, oppression, and punishment of people who may not believe, act, or live as you do. prop 8 is a reactionary move intended to strip happiness from a particular group of people.

Whatever gay Jesus, blow me.

On a side note: I watched Obama’s stop in Maryland on his way to Washington yesterday.

I was somehow lucky enough to have turned on CNN about twenty minutes before Obama gave his speech. I also watched a speech given by Congressman Elijah E. Cummings and Governor Martin O'Malley.

I don’t know if the people who type up the speech transcripts are busy nursing a hangover, but I am really irritated that I can’t find the poem that O’Malley recited.

I will look again tomorrow, but if anyone by chance knows what it is let me know.

Thanks :)


  1. Scott is officially awesome. If I had a MySpace, I'd send him a friend request. Fuck it.

    And I was completely unaware that Obama was in my homestate. Wish I could help you with the O'Malley speech but I didn't know he gave it. :)

  2. Dang...thanks anyways. I'm sure I'll be able to find it tomorrow.

    Nobody comes to Utah. lol

  3. That is a brilliant blog, i love the 'you hate gays' lol i wet myself.

    Alana the Mormons went to Utah! thats something yeah! :/

  4. I guess it is. :)

    And I came here too! lol

    we're adding a little pizazz to Utah, one crazy liberal at a time.


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